This Wednesday funny is brought to you by my cousin, J, who got it from his brother, T, who is an active-duty LT in the Navy. T, thank you for your service and your sense of humor.

Gotta love Texans…
So this Department of Water Resources representative stops at a Texas ranch and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, “I need to inspect your ranch for your water allocation.”

The old rancher says, “Okay, but don’t go in that field over there.”

The Water representative says, “Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me. See this card? This card means I am allowed to go WHEREVER I WISH on any agricultural land. No questions asked or answered. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?”

The old rancher nods politely and goes about his chores.

Later, the old rancher hears loud screams and spies the Water Rep running for his life and close behind is the rancher’s bull. The bull is gaining with every step.

The Rep is clearly terrified, so the old rancher immediately throws down his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs…..

“Your card! Show him your card!”

Thank you for stopping by, God bless you all, Wear Red on Fridays, and support Warriors for Innocence!

…and I even said so here.

Check this guy out – common sense personified.

Tip of the hat going out to Bushwack.

Thank you for stopping by, God bless you all, Wear Red on Fridays, and support Warriors for Innocence!

Just John has this up on his, and he got it from Hammer.

I hereby tag anyone who wants to do it, unless you already have, in which case leave a link to it in the comments.

Seven Weird Things About Me
1. I can let the mess build up around me, but when it gets to a certain point I go on a cleaning spree that would scare most people.

2. I live in the desert, but can’t stand the heat. I would rather live in the cold, since you can always add layers, but I just cannot take anything else off without scaring the dogs. And the neighbors.

3. When I was younger, I would drive like an absolute idiot. Now, I’m the old guy the absolute idiots are yelling at as they race to the next red light.

4. Where I will then nonchalantly slow right next to them and catch the green in perfect timing, pulling way ahead of them while they struggle to “impress” me with their gear-shifting abilities.

5. I still crack my knuckles, even though I’ve been told that they will swell up and give me arthritis. Newsflash – arthritis runs in the family anyway, and my knuckles still haven’t swelled up.

6. I never fill out memes or forward emails that tell me I gotta – so don’t send them to me. OK, except for this one.

7. When I have a nasal infection, I can smell it – when I am breathing through my nose, it smells like I need to check my feet to make sure I didn’t step in a dogpile on the way back inside.

OK – now, it’s your turn.

I dare you.

Thank you for stopping by, God bless you all, Wear Red on Fridays, and support Warriors for Innocence!

So much for liberals believing violence doesn’t solve anything:

H/T to Gawfer, who shares this news. Warning – offensive language. (at least, it’s offensive to ME when a “peace” activist attacks a war veteran AND HIS FAMILY)

Thank you for stopping by, God bless you all, Wear Red on Fridays, and support Warriors for Innocence!

Come join me on ‘The O Word’ on BlogTalkRadio.

Wearing my Rolling Thunder, might change to Lightning Sharp later…

Thank you for stopping by, God bless you all, Wear Red on Fridays, and support Warriors for Innocence!